Some of you may know, or have maybe heard me talk about my rocky relationship with my Dad in prior years. I always felt as if we were generations apart (and we were) and I sometimes felt as being his daughter was a duty.
I didn’t have many female friends growing up, my biggest influences were my Mum, my sister and my showjumping mentor.
I turned to the friendships with my guy friends to be my biggest peer influences. I wouldn’t change it but you obtain a different level or care and understanding as you would from females.
But, when I left highschool I started working on my relationship with my Dad. It was never BAD, just disjointed.
We started with what we knew… Sport. We amped that up in conversation. We spoke about University and Education, but really only on a surface level. I guess my Dad intimidated me a little with his academic standings and my conversations were somewhat narrowed to only the high end scores. Which I did get a few.
I can pinpoint two moments that dramatically changed the dynamic of our relationship (for me anyway, Dad might say different). The first was when I finished my first degree, Exercise Science. Dad took all my friends and I out for dinner, he seemed to have loosened up.
The other was when I was staying with him in his home in Seattle. I got to see him in his own environment for the first time in many years. I felt comfortable so I spoke openly about my boyfriend at the time, a completely new concept for us! Later, when that boy dumped me, Dad said don’t worry Samantha he was just a dead weight pulling you down you don’t need him. I will always love Dad for that comment.
People always ask me how i built my relationship with my Dad, I say time. Our relationship is far from a chore now. There are many times in a day I would like his advice, the fact that he lives on the other side of the world makes it somewhat difficult.
The past year, maybe less, something else has changed. I actually look forward to getting a big Dad hug every two and a half months when I see him. It sounds simple, but so fulfilling.
To this point from when I consciously made an effort to work in our friendship has been an eight year journey. Wow! I graduated my first degree in 2008, and my diploma in 2009. Just to give you a bit of a timeline.
I would like to now invite my Dad to interpret our relationship for my blog. Email me your response Dad and I will post it up!